Rogue (fieryrogue) wrote in boho_obsessed,

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Shiksas and Mudbloods

Oh girls, this is not a comeback for The Great Anthony/Adam/Ewan/RENT/Aida uh... thing, but I am posting this here because 1) you are Broadway girls and I know you know The Last Five Years songs. 2) Most of you are versed in Harry Potter, so I think you guys are the audience for this. :)

Ron waxes poetic about how he feels about Hermione.


I'm breaking my distant relatives' hearts
The longer I stand looking at you
The more I hear them criticize and snort
From ninety kilometers away

I'm breaking my distant relatives' hearts
Malfoy Manor of Wiltshire is shaking
And crumbling to the ground
Though they deserve it, those bastards
For always thinking that way

If you didn't like Quidditch, that wouldn't matter
If you had a crazed cat, that would be cool
If you came from Kent or from York
Or flew in on a stork
Just as long as you're not from Slytherin's school
I'd say, "Now I'm getting somewhere!
I'm finally breaking through!"
I'd say, "Hey! Hey! Mudblood goddess!
I've been waiting for someone like you."

I've been waiting through Patricia Stimpson and Romilda Vane
And the Patil twins
I've been waiting through Alicia Spinnet, Hannah Abbot, Angelina Johnson and Lavender Brown
And Susan Bones, Katie Bell, Cho Chang and Fleur Delacour
I've had Friday dinners by the fistful
With every family in Ottery St. Catchpole
But the minute I first met you
On the train I felt the love
I've been standing for days with this owl in my hand
Thinking instead I should be sending a dove
I've been looking at the wrong girls
I've been smothered, I've been bit
My people've been pureblood for thousands of years
And I don't give a shit!

If you really liked spiders, that wouldn't matter
If you study all night or read Hogwarts: A History again,
If you freed all the house elves and we had to dust our own shelves,
And they committed suicide 'cause they really do like the pain,
I'd say, "Well, nobody's perfect"
It's tragic but it's true
I'd say, "Hey! Hey! Mudblood goddess!
I've been waiting for someone like..."

You, stirring my cauldron
You, make me take flight
You, you are the broomstick
I should ride
I have to ride!

If you did things the Muggle way, that wouldn't matter
If you liked to play football, I think it's cute
If you've got a powerful connection to your library collection
I'd say, "That Descartes is a hoot!"
I'm your Pureblood slave, at your service
Just tell me what to do
I'd say, "Hey hey hey hey!
I've been waiting for someone
I've been praying for someone
I think that I could be in love with someone
Like you"
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